Wright Heads Back to School

Williams had impressed coaches in camp with his cut-back ability and willingness to work between the tackles. Now, they’ll need to put a huge load on Chris “Beanie” Wells, who hasn’t exactly been the poster boy for healthy, consistent play in his brief NFL tenure. Remember, former Arizona tailback Tim Hightower is now running as the lead man for the Shanahans in Washington.

Last season, Wells saw his production dive markedly. He’d averaged 4.5 yards per carry as a rookie in 2009 with seven touchdowns on 176 carries. He averaged 3.4 yards per carry in 2010 and scored twice.

LaRod Stephens-Howling and Alfonso Smith will vie for the backup role to Wells, though the team is likely to take a look-see at veteran options available on the wire (Clinton Portis is there now. Might Tashard Choice or Chester Taylor follow?).

For now, shift Wells up into the back end of the RB2 ranks. But, as always, make sure you’re protected by adding a third RB in short order.

Next up: Cleveland has reportedly dealt the pick to Atlanta.

And, Childress’ comments regarding “assurances” and “hugs” has been played everywhere. Childress later reached out to reporters to say that he was joking.

I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that he was Stephen Wright. Deadpan humor, wait for nervous chuckles or something? I don’t know that gallows humor is the way to go given the way things have been swirling in Minnesota all season. I’m sure I’m not the first to point out the similarity in tone, but it’s uncanny.

If the players and organization get his sense of humor (evidently the NFL-watching world and every reporter, scribe, pundit and commentator doesn’t), then that’s fine. He certainly sold the line by keeping his stoic facial expression. The organization has to close ranks and get in line. If this is part of the dynamic, then so be it.

Fans can’t wait for the post-game conference for Week 10. Either Brad Childress or Lovie Smith takes to the podium in defeat.

Instead, it was announced early this week that Warner would trade dancing in the pocket and avoiding a speeding Patrick Willis for the bright lights and sequined costumes of “Dancing With The Stars.” He’s the latest football player to join the fray, joined by former hoopster and budding thespian Rick Fox.

Arizona’s quarterback woes have been well-chronicled in the press of late, and the future of former first-round pick Matt Leinart is certainly in doubt. There have been whispers of trade talks and outright releases. All the while, we’re wondering if Warner would make a dramatic return to the field to save Ken Whisenhunt’s offense and restore the eroding confidence in the Arizona offense. His appearance in the “big reveal” for the new “DWTS” season, a run that included introductions of “The Situation,” “The Hoff,” and Michael Bolton (“The Voice”), probably kicked those hopes and dreams of NFL fans and fantasy owners to the curb. Kyle Massey of “That’s So Raven” rounds out the men’s side of the competition.

I’m still thinking about his 3,700 passing yards and 26 touchdown passes of a year ago. Alas, the pinball machine-like yardage total stops at 32,000 and change with 208 regular season touchdowns.

I can’t say that I’m terribly excited about the women’s side of things – no disrespect to Bristol Palin, Margaret Cho, Mrs. Brady, Audrina Patridge and Brandy. I can only get fired up for Jennifer Grey’s first onscreen appearance and Tom Bergeron’s first “nobody puts baby in a corner” reference. As I have Jerry Orbach on “Law & Order” from the DVR in the background right now, it seems like I should bust out some “Point Break” to round out the trilogy.

As with my tracking of Ochocinco’s progress last season, I’ll set the DVR to catch Warner’s movements on the dance floor. All the while, I’ll be lamenting that his quick release and pinpoint accuracy will be just an NFL memory. Owners of Larry Fitzgerald are hoping that his athleticism rules the day in spite of the quarterback situation.

In the interim, I’ll start working on an exemption to the uniform role to allow Warner to bring the glitz onto the field should he return. I’m thinking of an NFL version of Redford’s “Electrif Horseman” outfit.

Bloom also expresses his “man-crush” on Edwin Jackson and gets fired up for Diamondbacks baseball.

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