Monday Night Horror: I Like to Hurt People

If you go channel-surfing through your cable listings, you’ll stumble across the AMC Fearfest. You can find the best and worst (some of those sequels were terrible, no matter how much you love the genre or the “star”) of the horror world.

I propose that they chop up the first six weeks of the NFL season and add a two-hour special to the programming block. You don’t need to grab anything other that Dallas Cowboys highlights (lowlights) and a few clips of the New York Giants defense.

We build the villain by showing Peyton Manning’s surgeon-like precision against the Giants in Week 2 that helped create this monster. It’s the “Genesis” story.

– You build things with bad penalties and tipped balls.
– You add some levity and feel-good moments with lighter mood music. This gets put over clips of the Houston game and definitely take the game of leap-frog in the end zone out of context.
– Then, you start building the drama by showing a series of brutal hits against quarterbacks past by the Giants – you can get a LOT of mileage out of that Chicago game.

Our hero is about to come face-to-face with the monster.

Cue the big stage on Monday night. Show some Romo warm-up tosses. Cue some Jason … uh, it’s Justin … Tuck. Sorry, I got lost in the horror theme.

We need a montage of training and Cowboys-Giants games past. The story builds with the opening possessions and the early 10-0 lead for Dallas. It’s a positive story. Our hero will ride off into the sunset.

Cue the missed block by Gronkowski and the big hit on Romo. The music turns and a somber melody runs as the hit is shown from every angle. Credits roll as Romo remains on the turf.

The Giants have struck again. Cue the sequel in two weeks when this rested unit takes a shot at Matt Hasselbeck.

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