If you caught the post-Oscar special, you saw the introduction of the great “Jimmy K Hottie Body” workout program. Kimmel and his writers are back at it again, offering a diet plan to complement the revolutionary “Humpilates” routine.

Discover the Jim-Miracle Diet

Using his patented “Decalorizing Physioreduction Technology,” Jimmy K cuts your calorie count by 4/5. That’s right! Only 20% of the calories … and eat what you want!

Neil Patrick Harris makes a cameo as, well, a doctor. “Reduce by 80%”

“Cut the science talk, Dr. What does that mean?”

“It means four-fifths.”

Get your pre-eaten meals today!