It was announced in a simple statement (via Twitter) that the superstar small forward (30.1 PPG in 2009-10) had quietly agreed to a five-year extension of his contract worth an estimated $85 million. There was no pageantry, no entourage, no grandiose posturing or billboards or primetime special surrounding the deal. He could have waited another year and brought the noise and funk to the losers of the 2010 free agent sweepstakes. Instead, Durant is expected to sign his new deal on Thursday and get back to work alongside Russell Westbrook.

The sequel to this summer’s madness will have other leads. Who will be the man in the seat opposite the man/woman in Larry King’s seat next year?

I like that it was done simply in the new world order.

Tell you what. Let’s make it more modern. Sound the vuvuzelas.

I joked that I wasn’t going to sit and watch Game 7 after investing a ridiculous number of hours watching the three-month marathon that is the NBA Playoffs. Rip Van Winkle awoke to see that nothing had changed. The never-ending investigation of USC athletics … ended. Ubaldo won 13 games … almost as many as the Orioles.

In the end, I invested another three hours and was misera …. umm, entertained, by the final game of the season. I nearly fell asleep in the free-throw shooting festival of whistles that was the fourth quarter. Seriously, that was just painful to watch, particularly as the Lakers clanked free throw after free throw (they would convert two-thirds of their free throws for the game).

It came down to loose balls and rebounds. Period. True to form, the victor in Game 7 was the team that won the rebounding war. The Lakers out-rebounded the Kendrick Perkins-less Celtics by a margin of 13 overall (15 more offensive rebounds to offset the pathetic shooting display). At the center of the action was the dynamic duo, MVP Kobe Bryant and Pau Gasol. They combined to shoot a miserable 12-for-40, but lived at the free throw line and scored 42 points to go along with the astounding total of 33 rebounds.

The fact that Ray Allen couldn’t buy a bucket, Rondo has yet to develop an outside shot (his late three-pointer, notwithstanding) and there was little movement and ability to get to the bucket in the fourth quarter when the worm turned. Again, I saw the shots of Kendrick Perkins all suited up on the sidelines and wondered how this final game would have changed had he been able to participate in this one. If nothing else, there would have been five (or six) more hard fouls to give and Rasheed Wallace’s minutes could have been metered out a little bit more. I have to say that Glen “Big Baby” Davis was tremendous in this one, providing quality minutes and, well, a big body down low to at least give the Celtics a rebounding option (nine in his 20 minutes and change).

In a contest replete with as many missed shots as celebrity sightings, we did at least get the appearance of Brian Scalabrine for 51 seconds. More than a few Michael Rapaport references were made in sports bars and homes across America, and I just started yelling about “beautiful girls making you dizzy … like you’ve been drinking Jack and Coke all morning.” Seriously, I’m a fan – go rent “Big Fan” with Patton Oswalt and Rapaport (gets you jonesing for football after this rough-and-tumble Game 7).

Bryant won the Bill Russell MVP Award, although I still think they should take it to a metal shop and give Gasol half.

I mentioned Bryant’s rebounding before. There was where he shone on Thursday. His outside shot was terrible, and we can credit some good perimeter defense from Ray Allen. Bryant missed a number of free throws as well, but got to work on the glass.

And, his supporting cast picked him up. Derek Fisher knocked down a big three-pointer. Ron Artest (wearing No. 37 in the reverse of Dennis Rodman’s No. 73 during his Lakers tenure) knocked down a huge three-point shot off of a Bryant pass and did his best Rodman “thank you very much” acknowledgment to the crowd. He also caught a pass while cutting across the lane and tossed up a shot, hitting the ensuing free throw, to aid that fourth-quarter barrage.

Artest had been invisible for much of this series, leading many to start bringing up the name of former Lakers stopper, Trevor Ariza, who was swapped out for Artest this offseason. His 20 points, 5 rebounds and 5 steals helped carry the Lakers this evening and silenced the critics.

Some fans will start looking ahead to next week’s draft and the all-important July 1 beginning of free agency. I’m frankly shocked that I wasn’t offered a live look-in on LeBron James’ facial expressions while watching this Game 7. That might have been as entertaining as this slugfest. I’m counting down the six weeks until the start of NFL training camps.

Raise a glass to Kobe Bryant on winning his fifth title and to Phil Jackson on his 11th. The Artest experiment worked.

Now, how much does Phil want No. 12? Kobe was already talking up another run for a title.

Let’s put it on the shelf for awhile and enjoy the boys of summer.

PS – Can someone write the NBA equivalent of “One Shining Moment?”

It’s the efforts of a 30-year high school track & field coach here in southern California that has us captivated. And, it’s an event that occurred on April 29.

The coach of the Monrovia High team, Mike Knowles, vanquished by South Pasadena after a successful pole vault, called shenanigans following the try and had the winning vaulter disqualified. The move gave Monrovia its first league title and added to Knowles’ resume.

His offered quote of “I know the rule book” as a justification isn’t sitting well in the blogosphere and leaves me just shaking my head.

Compete hard. Work hard. Practice. Sacrifice. Work your body into an efficient machine … and don’t forget to memorize every line of the rule book. Your chemistry and calculus problem sets and that 10-page evaluation of Hamlet will have to wait.

You can say that the South Pasadena coach should have caught it before she headed out to make her winning vault. The coaches at South Pasadena obviously should have spent those extra practice minutes drilling on such rules and abhoring the virtues of obvious performance enhancers instead of teaching and refining technique. The fact that they didn’t notice, nor did the official at the event. tells you all you need to know about the importance of this rule to the overall competition. But, hey, it’s on the books, right?

I do need to find a complete copy of the rulebook, as I’m curious as to whether there’s a clause about shirts being tucked in or socked rolled properly or color coordination, hairstyles/clips, etc.

Are you trying to tell me that this string gave anybody an advantage? Are you worried that they’ll suddenly be shilling for a company at A HIGH SCHOOL TRACK MEET? Are you worried that someone will put on an obscene message for this highly visible event?

Asinine. Inane. Petty.

But, in the end, he can claim another title … gave the kids stories to tell at cocktail parties forever & us something else to blather about here and on the airwaves.

I just have a couple follow-ups …

Does he get more cash for reaching an incentive clause in his contract?

If there had been a cross or other religious or charitable designation on the bracelet, or what if she competed and paid homage to a family member or friend who couldn’t or had passed away?

Does Coach Knowles get one more step closer to a high school coaches Hall of Fame by adding another trophy to the case? After all, he’s listed as having won nine CIF-Southern Section championships, three CIF State championships and one national championship in his coaching career. Now, he adds this league title.

I must add that every reference to the national championship uses the term “mythical” to describe it. I’m most curious as to what that means.

Is this Knowles’ effort to get his career back on track following his dismissal from Muir High School (The Mustangs) in 2008 , the place where he piled up the credentials referenced above?
——————–

I get that we’re taught to be disciplined and play by the rules. I get that.

I just look at it as if the South Pasadena vaulter had given herself a small disadvantage by wearing the bracelet (miniscule extra weight, potential for a getting caught on the pole or whatever) and that if I were the Monrovia coach, I’d have wished she’d dressed as Mr. T for the competition. Wear all the jewelry you want … hell, he’s a special Flavor Flav clock that I purchased for the occasion!

Take the win, coach, and whatever spoils that come with it. Now, put the rulebook down and figure out how to get your girls to vault just a tad higher for State.

In the end, I was entertained and, well, my trigger-happy “recording” finger had set things for a series recording. As such, I found last week’s “DTWS” sitting on the DVR when I sat down to plot out the remainder of the work week.

So, I eschewed the other items on the DVR (horror movies, the “Life” series and other reality fodder) and clicked play. I did it without hesitation, like ripping off a band-aid.

Instead of writing a 9,000-word tome, I’m going to hit this quickly and show some love to the big ones — no, I’m not referring to Pamela Anderson (Scherzinger?).

Erin Andrews – She battled through a back injury and looked far more confident and trusting following last week’s blindfold tomfoolery (it had a ton of applications, evidently).

Evan – He snapped off his moves and, like Andrews, looked a lot more confident despite the dual-score thing coming into play.

Still, should these performers, ice guys and whatever else be in this thing?

Niecy – Seems to get through just fine. I noticed a couple of positioning issues w/ my untrained eye (take your worst stereotype of a 5-foot-7 fireplug trying to dance and crank it up to 11). Just didn’t seem to enjoy herself.

I couldn’t help but laugh at the “more hips” comment. Seriously?

Aiden – He looked stiff and you could almost see the steps coming together in his mind. Couldn’t feel the passion in this dance despite the outfit Edyta was sporting. It probably made him a bit nervous … and ultimately sent them home.

Nicole Scherzinger — What else can you say? She was nervous a bit about hands and her footwork following previous week’s criticism. However, it was still a smooth, stylized and sensual performance.

Bruno asked for “a little more sex.” You could only laugh.

Jake – He struggled with his footwork in the practice videos. Made a nifty move during his dance to “Never Met A Girl” across the stairs, but unfortunately had a couple missteps thereafter. He was definitely more into it, which seems to have helped. It pushed him up the leaderboard a couple spots.

Kate Gosselin & Tony – Gosselin is one of the stars everybody tunes in to watch each week. She made it through the Lady Gaga episode in the previous week & then had the latest court drama from the ex to fuel her. Kate still looks like she’s anticipating the next several steps and it makes things choppy, but she seemed more confident. It ain’t pretty, but it’s getting there …

Chad Ochocinco – He got the audience chuckling in the pre-taped piece by talking about his “hip action.” Ochocinco was much looser and more of the guy I and other sports folks have become accustomed to seeing. Ochocinco was in a flow and much improved — he just looked more comfortable in it.

Oh, and TO was there again. Where’s his gig?

Pamela – Well, what else needs to be said? This was a dance that left men with their jaws agape and happy that they sat in on the performance. Terrell Owens’ face in the crowd said it all. That was a dance ….

Don’t judge me. You already set me up with “Project Runway” every week. Tape the show. Forget that I haven’t seen a minute of this thing except for the clips on “Access Hollywood,” “Extra,” “Jimmy Kimmel LIVE” or “Good Day, L.A.” It’s a new world order, and I wanted to see it play out.

You’re going to have to convince me that I need to keep coming back.

The casts of past seasons were intriguing, without a doubt. Adam Carolla has spoken often in defense of his unicycle choice. And, of course, the success of NFL stars has certainly put things on my radar for interview and discussion purposes.

On this night, I just had to sit down and watch the latest NFL star participant, Chad Ochocinco, get his groove on. I shan’t lie. The thought of watching Pamela Anderson and Nicole Scherzinger dance, coupled with my curiosity about Kate Gosselin and Buzz Aldrin, helped seal the deal. So, I sat down for the competition, and then extended my viewing with the “Votes” show.

Now, for those that don’t know all about Chad, let me break it down quickly. He’s a jokester, shameless self-promoter, great interview and one hell of a football player. Some commentators deride him as “selfish” and question his antics (just do a YouTube search for “Ochocinco touchdown dance”), but give me a guy who still wants football to be fun while playing at a high level. Do yourselves a favor. Follow Chad on Twitter (@OGochocinco).

I preface my review of the show and its participants in this manner. I don’t know anything about dancing except that my shoulders are broad enough to serve as a pillow. And, if you rock back and forth long enough, you just might get a good-sized nap in (request the live “Freebird” or “Hotel California”). So, for my viewing purposes, I was trying to read facial expressions, watching footwork and just trying to get a gauge of whether the dancers were confident … and whether they entertained me.

The theme of the night was “Tell Me A Story.”

Let me tell you mine.

1st – Evan Lysacheck & Anna – Quickstep – “Chicago”

I liked the practice session, with Evan saying “I’m not going to do it unless you explain it in a thick Russian accent.” He looked stiff at times and I thought you could see the wheels spinning when it came to turn, but the cartwheel at the end provided a big finish and won over the crowd. Nice score.

PS – You should have talked about the broken toes before the dance. That Bruno guy would give you some sympathy or call you a warrior or something.

2nd – Buzz Aldrin & Ashley — “The Waltz’ — “It’s a Wonderful World”

I’m a big fan of playing “spot the product placement” on TV shows. There was definitely a spot for it in the pre-dance clip of Buzz recording Ashley on his phone. Take the cash where you can.

Oh, and he might have had the quote of the night from that one. “I don’t comprehend not thinking about something.”

You couldn’t help but get wrapped up into the story of a soldier returning. However, you could see Ashley tapping him to prompt moves and you could see him thinking on the floor. I wrote “statue” in my notes, a though echoed in Bruno’s critique.

You know what. I didn’t care. The man at 80 was out dancing and having fun, participating in this spectacle and genuinely enjoying this connection to another generation. I can only hope to be so full of life when I reach his age. I salute you.

His post-dance Q&A was classic and couldn’t help but stir you a bit: “A patriotic geezer like me …”

Geezer had gone out of the vernacular (at least I hadn’t heard it in awhile), but I love that he wore the term proudly. Godspeed, Mr. Aldrin.

I would have loved to see you stay, but the fan base didn’t rally this time.

PS – Why couldn’t they have given the singer of the house band a number off and let Louis Armstrong do his magic with the song?

3rd – Jake and Chelsea — “The Bachelor” — “Walk Like An Egyptian” — Quick-step

There was a nice dramatic clip before their dance, but I have to wonder how it affected America’s sentiments. Jake & Chelsea were shown arguing and talking about respect.

In the end, he looked like he was having fun with it and was loose on his feet. And, they recognized that IT WAS A SHOW and used props and such. Again, perhaps it didn’t flow to professional dance standards, but it worked for a slouch like me.

In the sake of full disclosure, I’d never seen “The Bachelor” before one episode of Jake’s season. I still want to hit the production people for the flyover opener with him leaning on the motorcycle.

4th – Niecy & Louis — “The Waltz” – “With You, I’m Born Again” – Billy Preston

The dance flowed nicely, but I agreed with Len on the summary statement. Wasn’t she supposed to be happy at the end of the storyline of love struggles?

The inter-racial and gay marriage storylines certainly put a charge into the show and could have changed the mood. Living in LA, it’s a debate that remains in the forefront of political talk. I stepped back and wondered how the commentary was viewed by the nationwide viewing audience.

5th — Ochocinco & Cheryl — “Paso Doble”

This was the dance I was waiting for. Seriously, I had to get the NFL spin on it and add to the list of topics to torment Chad about come training camp.

The pre-dance roll had Cheryl explaining the dance “You’re trying to seduce me, but I want nothing to do with you. “Sounds like real life.”

He talks to himself, berates himself and tries to pump himself up. What’s not to like?

During the dance, Ochocinco keeps an intense look, and though his movements were sometimes forced, he looked comfortable overall. He’s a man known for end zone dances, so I expected nothing less.

I particularly enjoyed the shots of Florence Henderson and George Lopez during his dance. I don’t know why, but I did. The end of the dance offered the potential for an Adrien Brody-Halle Berry moment that didn’t materialize.

Ochocinco lives to see another day. I’ll be back next week, right?

6th – Pamela & Damian — Paso Doble – “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood”

Charo! Seriously, they busted out (no pun intended) Charo!

Whatever she helped Pamela with, it worked. She struggled a bit early with her hands, but found the rhythm and put together a great performance. Oh, and the snarky sense of humor came out at the end.

Do we still like Pam? Is the target audience digging Pam? Is she growing on them after nearly getting eliminated last week?

7th – Aidan & Edyta —- Quick-step –

I hated the line about “giving 150%” in the pre-dance B-roll. That always gets the blood boiling, but so be it. Aidan was stiff early as he brought his painting to life and then started to bounce and skip and have fun with it. He felt middle of the pack and that’s where he ended up.

8th – Erin & Maksim – Waltz –

I don’t know Erin, but have many friends and colleagues who have met or worked with her in the past and speak highly of her. So, I was happy to see her joking and laughing, enjoying this moment despite all of the things swirling around in the background.

They won the award for creativity with the inclusion of the blindfold. It was an element that certainly sent minds racing, but probably served as a nice bond-building structure for the dancers.

Len whined about the “walking” and his desire for “more dancing.” I thought it was all dancing, even in the pauses. I really need to go buy a rulebook …

9th Kate & Tony – “Paparazzi” — Paso Doble

As much as I was interested in seeing Chad and Pamela … and Erin and Buzz, I was certainly interested in seeing Kate Gosselin’s dance. At one point, the “Plus 8” show was a regular part of the viewing cycle and the “spot the product” game was born.

I liked the tongue-in-cheek song selection and the setup. I didn’t quite recognize her in the Cruella de Vil outfit out of the gate, but liked the choreography and where they were headed. I felt for her. You want to let it go and live in the moment, but she was clearly in her head about the steps and probably one million other things.

But, she said she felt proud after getting through the dance. Face your fears and issues and plow forth. Who’s to argue with that?

10th – Nicole & Derek — Quick-step – slacking off sailors – Anything Goes

I’m just going to ask it plainly. Why does she get to be in this?

Now, I’m not complaining about the outfit and her appearance, and there were certainly enough teases with her to keep the boyfriends and husbands engaged for the two hours, but she at an inherent advantage?

This was another great example of me knowing absolutely nothing about dance rules and such. Good entertainment is good entertainment.

So, yell from the rooftop, Mr. Len (I liked her “we broke Len’s Commandments” line), but you can’t deny that they stole the show. It was a fitting end to the night.

As I alluded to above, I did come back for the elimination show. I enjoyed the Reba McEntire numbers, although I would have liked to see them work to an extended version of “Fancy” or another classic.

Chad Ochocinco gave the audience and Brooke Burke a moment of pause when he spoke of “making love on the dance floor” with next week’s Rhumba, and Tom Bergeron capped it with a good joke.

All in all, I was entertained. Will it keep me tuning in on a consistent basis?

You tell me. Convince me.

Enough tap-dancing – What did I think of the movie?

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The first observation from viewing this film is the obvious.

The tension of this film is palpable from the opening frame. Every line, every interaction … every blink … just might trigger the next IED explosion. And there is the crux of the film. You are put into the fourth seat of the Humvee to join the EOD crew in their missions, heads on a swivel to continually assess potential threats.

The conversations, even when they turn to introspection and the creation a personal bond between the soldiers, leave you uneasy. The long shots of vast desert demonstrate the isolation of Delta Company as the countdown to the end of their tour continues. There are, of course, other soldiers in the area and you get those shots in a few base scenes. But, ultimately, the EOD crew is shown as detached from the rest of the mission. I likened their calls to the one placed to Harvey Keitel, “The Wolf,” in “Pulp Fiction.” He comes in to clean up the mess and, humorous anecdotes and zippy one-liners aside, there’s still a matter of life and death here.

I also admit here that early on, I had the question (in my head, for fear of losing any respect my wife had/has for me) of how they determined who wore “the suit.” Was it a question of size and stature, as in the famous “Brady Bunch” episode where Greg dreams of pop idol superstardom? My digressions into the pop culture reservoir was short-lived. I snapped back into reality and found myself trying to get into the heads of this crew and Renner’s character.
Kathryn Bigelow is expected to become the first women to win a directing Oscar. She effectively stretched that tension for over 2 hours. She demonstrated the agony of the job mixed with the adrenaline rush and bravado in Renner’s character and how his head-first way of doing his job impacted morale and the psyches of his fellow soldiers. I applaud Bigelow’s restraint and selective use of music.

This wasn’t your typical Army ad with a heavy metal riff in the background. Sure, there were moments of heavy strains, but tell me you didn’t see this thing and wait for Renner to don the suit and walk toward an EOD with “American Badass” blaring in the background. Seriously, you didn’t hum a couple bars along the way?

When the “365″ tag appeared at the top of the screen and the credits began to roll, I said a quick prayer of thanks for our friends and families currently overseas and those who have completed their service, not to mention their families.  It is one of those films that helps you reset your sense of self, if only momentarily. I then added “The Hurt Locker” to that ever-expanding list of films that I enjoyed and that I’m glad that I saw. It’s also in that list of films that I don’t intend to revisit anytime soon.
I promise to get the DVD back in the mail tomorrow so they can update the label with its Oscar wins.

Get ready for a barrage of statistical nuggets to help you dominate your league and all of your in-office water cooler conversations. Wait … are there still water coolers in offices?

In this area of the SwollenDome world, I’m going to load you up with some whimsical stat breaks, liner notes and tidbits to get you fired up for the next games on the schedule.

On Friday, I’ll load up this page with a bucket of statistical nuggets to take you into the long holiday weekend and throw out at your fellow owners in the draft room. I’m adding value … ALL DAY LONG.